Archive for December, 2009
Things I Learned in 2009
2009 was another year of learning and thanksgiving on Hil Street.
- We celebrated six years of marriage and vacationed in Playa del Carmen, San Francisco, Nashville, Las Vegas, and Louisville.
- We implemented a “Google Calendar” to help our communication, and things have never run more smoothly.
- We learned the true traits of a Maine Coon cat, now knowing Martin is a Maine Coon for sure.
- I ran an estimated 800 miles with Hollis. He is still crazy.
- Obama was inaugurated.
- Ellie had a baby, Alexis had a baby, Tab had a baby, Kelly had a baby, Lacy had a babies, and Becky, Morgan and Tara got pregnant. Lots of baby showers!
- We miss our friends.
- I had to buy deodorant.
- Alan and Jessica got engaged.
- I went to my 10-year high school reunion.
- Keri moved back to the Midwest and went back to school.
- Greg and Misti are exploring the world of home school.
- We said goodbye to Willard Johnson and John Carlton.
- Husbanks celebrated his one year Schwanniversary at Charles Schwab as a 401k Account Manager.
- I made a mix CD for Dawkins of Ben Folds favorites.
- I went back to PR.
- Husbanks learned to juggle.
- Husbanks participated in a 24-hr mountain bike race.
- Many friends were in national news outlets.
- I took evening classes about Jerusalem and Youth Ministry at Austin Seminary.
- Saint John’s United Methodist is still consuming most of our free time.
- We watched our wedding tape.
- I gave my first sermon in big church.
- I have blogged for almost three years.
Ruby
Posted by hilstreet in austin, texas, faith, friends on December 30, 2009
Yesterday afternoon I attended a church member’s funeral. Ruby had been under hospice care after a battle with cancer. She was in her 70s.
I met Ruby because she was a fellow alto in the church choir. Her voice was soulful and beautiful. Walking in to her funeral, I knew she was musical, a long-time educator in the Austin Independent School District (AISD), and a long-time member of our church. It turns out I knew very little.
The choir (leaving Ruby’s chair empty) sang five songs in her honor. 13 people (including the former AISD Superintendent) spoke of Ruby’s accomplishments. Ruby earned her master’s degree in the 50s. As a black woman receiving her masters in Texas in the 50s – she led the way for so many. Heather told me her husband was the first black Austin City Councilman since the 1800s. When Ruby retired after a long career as an educator and administrator, the City of Austin declared her retirement day as Ruby Handcox Day.
Ruby!?!? You were amazing.
After the service, Callie, Sarah H., Heather and I enjoyed a long conversation about Ruby over margaritas and queso. We talked about her ability to make people understand civil issues. Her civic leadership. How classy she was and how hilarious she was. We even had debates of our own as we discussed global warming, gay rights, and church politics. There we were, educated, young, working women lucky enough to talk openly about our views of the world. Ruby would be glad to know that’s what we did after her service. We are lucky to have these freedoms – thanks to trailblazers like Ruby.
This is one of the many reasons I belong to a church community. I learn from strong women older than me.
After the funeral, I received an email that my college roommate Becky is having a baby boy. The circle of life! Life made more equal by people like Ruby Handcox.
God bless you, Ruby.
Things I learned visiting Lubbock, Texas during Christmas
Posted by hilstreet in austin, texas, faith, family, holidays on December 29, 2009
1. I got game
Buffalo burgers and venison spaghetti (with Andria’s homemade sauce) are delicious! Husbanks’ mother sent us home with 11 lbs of gathered meat (Husbanks’ father enjoys hunting). Recipes will get creative.
2. Ryan is a bad ass
Ryan successfully drove, patiently, through 60 miles of iced, snowy, rural highway on Christmas Eve. So many stranded cars. So many cops pushing cars out. The Honda arrived in Lubbock without a scratch. Ryan’s combination of hand-eye coordination, patience, and mastery of machine impressed me to no end.
3. The Snuggie has a downfall
Static cling is shocking in the Snuggie.
4. Itinerancy has a purpose
I have long prayed and meditated over itinerancy. It’s a big challenge for me in the Methodist church. I watch my female clergy friends move from congregations they love and were loved in to small towns that wouldn’t accept women. Where they felt like a guest in their own congregation.
On Sunday, we attended a small Methodist church in Lubbock where Eric and Tara’s collegiate minister and marriage officiant pastored. She preached on the juxtaposition of Jesus’ birth, and watching an experienced minister of higher education in a small rural church was quite the juxtaposition as well. After the service, she and I discussed the challenges of serving in rural Texas. She told us that after two weeks, even her biggest, most conservative dissenters would stop and say “I spoke out against women pastors … but now I am glad you are here.” This is something ushered in by the itinerant system. And I see now that it is beautiful.
The drive to and from Lubbock we tried an alternate route (an ill-fated attempt to avoid ice), and we played a game: tally every church you see. See which denomination has the most churches in rural Southwest Texas.
Methodists won out big time, folks. On highway 87, in the rural-ist and dusty-ist areas of Texas, you can find a United Methodist congregation anywhere. This is something that could only be achieved by the itinerant system. And I see now that it is beautiful.
Holiday Card Sweep …
When Husbanks and I were first married, Christmas cards all looked the same: Start on the porch. Insert beautiful Baylor couple. Type Bible Verse. Add Labrador.
Then, we went through the creative-artsy stage when the Thronson’s card appeared.
Now, cards are full of new babies and pregnant friends (even got a sono picture from Becky!). We also received some “travel” cards, chronicling places visited throughout the year. Ellie’s card included hilarious outtakes when Colin wasn’t participating.
When you look at one picture a year, it becomes obvious how much we are growing up. *sigh* Merry Christmas.
Finding God in Unlikely Places …
Posted by hilstreet in austin, texas, faith on December 18, 2009
Today’s youth ministers are working with a generation called the “Millennials.” Technologically advanced and highly motivated, these teenagers – like every generation before them – have cultural considerations that must be evaluated to understand their motivations. Possibly most defining, Millennials are more comfortable with technology than we are. As the first generation to grow up using the Internet and cellular technology, they are efficient at communicating and innovating with technology. Teenagers today use technology to connect with each other in a secret code that the adults and authority figures they desperately want to avoid cannot understand. This provides more avenues for marketers to get in touch with teens without the parents’ filter.
Millennials have a different attitude about school than my Generation X. Like the technology that makes their lives instant, Millennials want to be the top of the class immediately. This entitlement can be attributed to parenting; Millennial parents are ensuring that today’s teenagers are highly-scheduled and successful. This reaction is often understood as a reaction to Generation X’s teenagers’ absent parents. Millennials are also the generation that questions school authority. They were in the classroom during Columbine – Millennials were the first generation to see that high school may not be safe (Info from The Perennial Mellinnial, a.k.a. Blake).
While technology, entitlement, and the drive to succeed make Millennials a unique generation, Today’s young millennials, like teenagers before them, are still kids. They are still emotional and they question authority. It can be difficult to be patient and see God in today’s teens, but the nature and purpose of the divine is there.
Teenagers can be overly expressive and excited. I used to get annoyed and chalk this up to hormones, but there is another reason teenagers seem to scream louder than most. They are making sure we hear them.
From the very beginning, God knew that we could be a stubborn bunch. Look at the Tree of Knowledge. God set one simple rule and human curiosity challenged it forcing God to take extreme measures to ensure it did not happen again. This altered history. Sometimes the gentle wind of the spirit may come in a whisper. But the Israelites knew when Yahweh was trying to make a point. Sometimes God would scream.
Paragraphs upon paragraphs in scripture describe the precise building and rebuilding of the Tabernacle, and the fear, awe and power of the Ark of the Covenant. King David was moving the Ark of the Covenant when the oxen carrying the Ark shook it. When Uzzah touched the Ark to steady it … he was immediately struck dead. Now that’s screaming.
In The God-bearing Life, Kenda Creasy Dean and Ron Foster remind us of what we can learn from Moses’ ministry and apply to youth ministry. When Moses was summoned to speak for the Lord and lead the Israelites to freedom, God brought a burning bush to get his attention. In a time before virtual realities and movie effects, fires were pretty awe-inspiring. God used extremes to shout “Hey! Listen! I have an idea, I don’t think you are going to like it … but I need to say it anyway!” How often do the youth we work with have the same message?
Without teenagers in our churches looking to be heard, what would we miss? It is the nature and purpose of God to speak out for and represent the least of these. Oftentimes, teenagers, not yet jaded and cynical by politics, stereotypes, or generalizations, can more easily see all humans as creations of God. There are times we don’t listen to their views until they scream or take extreme stances. Maybe that’s why they shout! Kenda Creasy Dean and Ron Foster share more thoughts on teenagers’ extreme emotions and spirituality:
“Speaking the truth in love, for example, is an important way teenagers minister to the church. Undeveloped ideological filters – the kind that help you and me screen out certain emotional stimuli—contribute to the emotional roller coaster of adolescence. Teenagers have trouble sorting through lesser emotional claims in favor of primary ones; every emotion is primary to a teenager. This emotional openness has an upside: It helps teenagers tune in both to God and to other human beings in ways adults have long since forgotten. Consequently, youth can be prophetic voices in the wilderness who call us to respond on God’s behalf to people we would otherwise overlook.” (The God-bearing Life, 116)
There is no doubt that Jesus questioned authority. He looked at the culture around him – the dishonest leadership and the misguided values – and he questioned it. Jesus constantly went back and forth with the Pharisees and Sadducees with rhetorical questions and loaded answers. When Jesus returned to the temple, he turned the tables in rage. Today’s generation is no exception. Teenagers today question all authority figures from their parents to their teachers to their first bosses to their ministers.
And when Jesus needed a community, did he turn to leaders and the authority? No. He rallied a group of ordinary men to take on an extraordinary task – to recognize, practice, and evangelize the need for God’s love. While technology, attention at home, the quest to succeed, and questioning of authority have given Millennials many traits that leave youth ministers challenged, it also has given a wonderful gift. Millennials are the first generation to be extremely informed about up-to-date global crises like global warming, pollution, human trafficking, and genocide. Millennials are teenagers, but their use of technology has given them virtual pen pals all over the world as well as access to quick information and breaking news. With this access and knowledge of global tragedies, they yearn to seek justice and love kindness. Teenagers’ quest for social justice has been squelched since the Industrial Revolution and high school’s beginnings. We are seeing a recent resurgence with global injustice awareness due to the proliferation of the Internet.
Without teenagers to question authority and keep us balanced, the risk begins for our churches and families and communities to remain in a pattern doing things ‘because we have always done them that way.’ Teens question the need to continue with tradition.
Eleven-year old Atlanta native Jonathan McCoy is making a decision for the rest of his life. He is making the commitment to never use ‘the n-word.” He has made a pledge, gone on sermon and speaking tours, and is making a commitment as a child to never say this word. It all started with a speech contest where McCoy’s speech about these convictions won first place. A quote from McCoy from CBS News: “According to the definition of the n-word, an n-word will never be a lawyer, a doctor or a teacher,” said McCoy, “It is implausible that 40 years after the assassination of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., that we still use this word that holds no worth in our lives and our future … I say, ‘don’t use the n-word.’”
Over a million people have watched his award-winning speech on YouTube and over 3,000 people have signed his online petition making the same promise he has.
Saying you will never do something is an extreme stance. But McCoy truly believes it. He has the energy, passion, and confidence to guarantee his promise even more so because he is young. Paul taught us that the passion of youth is an asset. He reminded us to “get the word out. Teach all these things. And don’t let anyone put you down because you’re young. Teach believers with your life: by word, by demeanor, by love, by faith, by integrity. Stay at your post reading Scripture, giving counsel, teaching. And that special gift of ministry you were given when the leaders of the church laid hands on you and prayed—keep that dusted off and in use.” (1 Timothy 4:11-14, The Message)
Today’s youth have an abundance of gifts demonstrating the nature of God within them. As part of the Four Areas of Focus, The United Methodist Church wants to “raise up young leadership.” This is no coincidence. A congregation is thriving when youth are a part of it. The church staff may not be able to control or predict the path and mission field a young church will take, but youth bring life to a church because they bring God’s purpose to look for justice, to yell from the mountain tops for what is right, and question ‘tradition for traditions sake. Thanks be to God!
I am sharing all this because tonight Husbanks and I are chaperoning the Austin-area youth lock-in. I needed a little pep talk to get myself ready to confiscate illegal substances at 3:00 a.m. I can find God in these kids, and I should help these teenagers discover and strengthen the Godly traits they already possess. Thanks be to God!
No but really, pray for us. Sheesh.
Things you don’t remember from your wedding …
Oh my goodness. There are things from your wedding that you don’t remember and they are hilarious. Here, a random sample:
1.You looked even younger than you imagined.
2. Your organist played codas like an 80′s hair-metal musician. Every song wouldn’t end. Just when you thought it would … he’d scale back up to the top and start again. Hilarious.
3. Most of your wedding was prayer. During the 20-minute ceremony, you prayed three times.
4. You had about fifteen candles in the front of the church alone. Dangerous!
5. You talked through the whole thing. What in the world did you need to talk about?
6. Your dress was BIG!
Six.
Over Thanksgiving, Ryan and I met up with my childhood best friend. Travis and I were neighbors growing up and had most of our classes together. Our evening was so much fun. We ate at chain-restaurant-king Chili’s and rented Spice World to make it a true 1990s high school night. Only thing missing was Ellie and Jill.
While out, Travis handed me a mini VHS. On it? Ryan and my wedding. Travis’ mom had recorded the ceremony from her hand-held video camera (this was pre-USB flip cam, Millennials). She lost then found the recording and gave it to Travis to hand to us. I have never watched any recording from my wedding. Isn’t that crazy to think I have it now?
This weekend is our six-year wedding anniversary. We’ll watch the wedding for the first time. I have no idea what my reaction will be. Will I feel like I am watching someone else’s wedding? Will it be in focus? Will the sound work? Did Whitney and Jonathan sing in tune? Did Stacie’s dress look shiny and new after the third big event? Can I handle watching my father walk me down the aisle?
Why has this recording been lost for so long?
Answer: People are not patient. Scripture and proverbs from many traditions tell us to be patient but earthly curiosities and desires get the best of us. Rumor has it: Patience is a virtue. If I had this recording before Thanksgiving 2009, I would have watched it and it would have been nice … but now it means a lot.
In my youth I was not a patient girl. Jumping from experience to experience was my forte. Twice now in my grown-up life, significant things have come to me in later time than I wanted (Sarah H. knows). I now see that waiting is a gift. I had to wait to see that.
If I would have had this video immediately … I would have watched it immediately. Glad I didn’t. Watching this video after six years is going to give me a glimpse of my life and family that I have forgotten. I’ll need a glass of wine and some tissues, but it will be a blessing.
And really funny to see us all young and acting sewius during our vows. I mean … really? Do kids know what marriage has in store? Noooooooo.
Love you, Husbanks. Can’t wait to travel back in time with you this weekend. You are a more and more wonderful husband everyday, but I bet you look cute in that wedding video.
What New Babies Need …
I’m in that phase of life where my friends are having babies all the time. I host baby showers at least monthly with my trusty companion, Sarah H. I recently purchased a punch bowl because, hey, let’s admit the facts here. Punch is a baby shower must-have and it doesn’t serve itself. And I got too nervous continually borrowing the official punchbowl from the Southwest Texas United Methodist Church Conference.
Baby showers are important because they prepare the mother for what she physically needs to take care of a new life. It shows the support of family and friends all pitching in a little bit to make a grand nursery possible (many stylish items you can find at Two Blue Peas).
And, as Sarah H. says, “every baby deserves a party!”
Another way to support your pregnant friends is through prayer. Julia’s son, Braden, was born Thursday at 28 weeks. Her strong network of family and friends have been sending thoughts and love for the past seven weeks as she has been in the hospital. Prayer is important because it prepares a mother-to-be for the spiritual peace needed to take care of a new life.
Another way to support friends with new babies is to bring them food after the baby is born. Many new mothers receive the lasagna below from me. It’s the best lasagna I have ever tasted (it’s real ‘marican). Make it for a mother-to-be today! Or, enjoy it yourself.
Kevin’s Favorite Lasagna
1 lb ground beef
2 cloves garlic, minced
1 tsp dried basil
1 tsp dried oregano
28 oz (1 Jar) roasted red pepper pasta sauce
3 Tbsp. Sugar
Salt and pepper
2 Tbsp. red wine (optional)
1 can chicken stock
8 oz cream cheese, softened
2 Tbsp. white wine (optional - I mean, when do you have red AND white wine open?)
8 oz freshly grated mozzarella
6 to 8 no-boil lasagna noodles (enough to cover area of dish)
2 C steamed, well-drained spinach
1 C freshly grated parmesan
6 slices white American cheese
Heat oven to 400. Grease a 9 x 13 inch pan. Thoroughly cook the ground beef, garlic, and herbs in a large skillet, stirring frequently and breaking up the meat. Drain fat. Stir in pasta sauce and sugar and bring to a simmer for about two minutes. Season to taste with salt and pepper and add the red wine, if using. Set aside.
In a medium saucepan over medium heat, bring chicken stock to a boil. Add softened, cubed cream cheese, turn heat to low, and whisk until smooth (about six minutes). Season to taste and add the white wine, if using.
Spoon half the meat sauce into the pan as evenly as possible. Sprinkle one-third of the grated mozzarella over the meat mixture. Top with three or four lasagna noodles. Spread spinach evenly over the noodles.
Pour the cream cheese sauce over the noodles and cover with another one-third of the of grated mozzarella. Arrange three or four lasagna noodles over the cheese, then spoon remaining meat mixture over the noodles as evenly as possible.
Lay all slices of white American cheese on top and then top with the final third of the mozzarella and the grated parmesan. Bake uncovered until brown and bubbling, 35 minutes.
Let cool for 10 to 15 minutes or it will be too gloppy to cut well.
You can make ahead of time, cover, and freeze – just be sure to thaw in the fridge before baking. You’ll bake for 45 minutes if you have made the lasagna in advance and are baking it from the fridge.


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